Explaining marriage, monogamy and polygamy
INTRODUCTION
The human being develops a first bond with a person who will over time transform into a romantic link (Bowlby, 1969). Unfortunately, this attachment is not always safe and quiet, so sometimes insecurity, doubt and fear of losing when loved and with it an obsessive concern for this arises.
Jealousy is an important psychological mechanism for men and women, which are activated in response to the threat of a valuable relationship. There are differences in the response of men and women in a jealous situation. In general, men feel more concerned than women for potential sexual infidelity and women feel worse than men in a hypothetical emotional infidelity. There is no dependence between sex and the type of jealousy experienced when sociocultural factors are controlled.
The cultural context influences emotions, is part of them, acquiring their real meaning in interpersonal situations to the point that are socially built. From a socioconstructive perspective, emotions are considered complex phenomena, whose main elements are a set of beliefs, judgments and derivatives of the system of beliefs, principles and moral values of a social group, so that this system of beliefs and values that characterizes each emotion is learned and acquired by individuals through the socialization process.
Due to the role that jealousy plays as one of the causal factors in gender violence, a line of research has recently begun in order to analyze the jealousy that occurs in love relationships . Jealousy is a negative complex emotion. They appear before the real or imagined suspicion of a threat to a relationship considered valuable. Jealousy is defined as a response to what is perceived as a threat that looms about a relationship considered valuable or about its quality. Understood as an emotion, jealousy is an answer that warns that a relationship we want to maintain is threatened.
In an investigation, the differences between men and women in their way of experiencing jealousy, depending on the type of infidelity of their partner, obtained that men feel more concerned than women for hypothetical sexual infidelity of their partners and that women womenThey feel worse than men before a hypothetical emotional infidelity, there is genetic predisposition to explain these differences.
Jealousy are intended to maintain the relationship with the couple, act as a alarm signal of a possible threat, since infidelity takes place in all cultures, at all times and is usually the main cause of divorce and conjugal abuse.
Men can fertilize an undetermined number of women, since they generate a high amount of sperm and make less energy investment than women for successful reproduction of their genes. (Buss, 2000). However, in women the gestation period (nine months) determines the possibility of reproduction of their genes, so they make a greater energy investment.
Women ensure reproductive success focusing their resources on a small number of descendants, while men prioritize more sexual relations.
The woman will always have the certainty that the son who expects is his, therefore, will carry her genes, while for the man she feels equally insurance of her paternity she must monitor and control the sexual behavior of her partner, making sure that, before being the fertilized woman, she has only had sex with him. In men, jealousy would constitute an alert mechanism in the face of the safety threats of their paternity, thus needing a sexually faithful couple. However, for women the main threat to their young is that their partner diverts resources towards the offspring of other women with whom it maintains relationships, therefore, they require an emotionally faithful couple.
Monogamy and polygamy
Monogamy is the type of sentimental bond between two people that does not allow intimate relationships with other subjects. On the contrary, polygamy is the state in which relations with several people of the other sex simultaneously maintain. (Definition.Of, 2019)
Why is monogamy implanted in our culture?
The concept of Monogamia has changed over time. In general, it can be said that it is a model of sexual and affective relations that is based on exclusivity: the monogamous individual maintains a unique relationship with his partner, rejecting the same actions with other people.
Monogamy is usually the most used system by the countries of the West. The courtships and marriages are based on the formation of a couple, unite a man with a woman;to a man with a man;or a woman with a woman.
Monogamy in humans is not natural but a social construction, derived from a political, cultural and economic scheme. This situation has worked so far because the man was a woman’s possessor, but this is not a couple’s life, it is the life of a master with a slave. A healthy romantic relationship is one in which one is independent of the other but there is a strong bond between them.
There is a new life model in which in the future no couple will pretend to be a lifetime with the other and not only help reduce the number of suicides in the world, but also reduce the great unhappiness indices that produces love badcarried. Families will be very different from how we currently understand it. They will be matriarchal societies, where mothers and sisters conform to family unit, and will not be a unit formed by husband and wife. In a society away from monogamy, all the problems of jealousy or dependencies would be solved.
OBJECTIVES
We have proposed as the main objective the following: provide knowledge, develop skills and build favorable attitudes for young people to establish healthy relationships, understanding as healthy those based on respect and equality between the two people (in the absence of violence).
Activity to prevent gender violence.
The program we are going to offer will be named "healthy couples relationships". We see it as a fundamental contribution to prevent violence in pairs, thus helping their "healthy" development.
“Relations of healthy couples” is aimed at students of higher education, above all, university students or professional training students. This sector of the population has been chosen because at that stage of life the relationships of definitive couples begin to form, so this factor will determine the quality of the relationship. In addition to this, when young people become professionals, they can collaborate in the fields of work (which they have chosen), thus promoting an attitude of respect and equality between genres and what is most important among people.
As we have mentioned in the previous point, we reiterate our objective that is: to provide knowledge, develop skills and build favorable attitudes for young people to establish healthy relationships, understanding as healthy those based on mutual respect and equality between both people. This program is designed as a primary prevention tool. It is also directed towards young people who can present a threat of exercising that violence.
The program will be designed to introduce it as optional academic activities and must be adopted by the majority of possible universities. While the program, in principle, was aimed at young people with higher education, can also be adapted for young secondary education students.
Activity design
The program will be organized in 13 sessions whose duration will be an hour and a half each. The contents we want to offer will be differentiated in 5 blocks, consisting of 5 sessions in which the norms will be announced and different dynamics will be made to be able to recognize violence in all the manifestations that it can adopt developing the ability to have an attitudeCriticism of this aspect. In addition we will also relate the violent facts to the different types of gender stereotypes that exist. To end we will explain the characteristics that are developed in the relationships of young people and their consequences in the legal framework as well as the resources they have to put an end to this violence.
Block II healthy couple relationships, formed by 3 sessions where the issue of communication in the couple will be addressed by offering young people to allow them assertive communication (understanding assertive as respect, equality and understanding) with their partner forFinally become a healthy couple.
Block III self-knowledge and emotional expression, consisting of 2 sessions. This block is of vital importance since we will teach them how to know themselves in relation to their feelings. We will help them identify their behaviors derived from a feeling so that they can control their actions and are neither victims nor aggressors.
Block IV solving the problems in a non -violent way formed by a session where strategies will be provided to solve different problems that we will ask throughout the session. With this we will get them to face and solve the problems in the most correct way possible.
The V block sharing my learning will consist of two sessions that serve young people to merge all the knowledge, strategies and values that have been transmitted in the duration of the program through a practical activity in which they will be evaluated.
Activity results
We hope to get positive results. While a greater awareness of non -violence in the couple in addition to respect and equality can change the future of our society a lot in this aspect, thus avoiding the deaths that occur more and more by such violence generated among couples among couples.
BIBLIOGRAPHY
- Bowlby, J (1969). Ibero -American Psychology, Vol. 16.
- Archer, j. (nineteen ninety six). Sexes in Sexual Behavior: Are The Social Role and Evolutionary Explanations Compatible?. American Psychologist, 51, 907–917.
- Haron-Jones, J (1986), Corsí, C (2003), Salovey, P (1991), Pines, T (2008), Buss, D (2000). Jealousy and emotions: relationship factors in the reaction to infidelity. Digital Athenea – No. fifteen.
- Definition.Of (2019). Definition of monogamy and polygamy. Recovered from 2008. https: // definition.of/monogamy/https: // definition.of/polygamy/
- Guioteca (2017). Is the polygamous man by nature? Science clarifies an ancient doubt. Retrieved Thursday, March 23, 2017. https: // www.Guioteca.com/myths-and-enigmas/es-el-man-poligamo-by-naturalness-the-aclara-a-dude-millennial/
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