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Why the punishment is not the solution
The art of educating our little ones is not something that should be taken lightly. Art, yes, after all we are collaborating in the process of creating a human being. We are laying the foundations for your future personality. And that’s why today I come to tell you why punishment is not the solution in this process. The punishment is framed in the behavioral orientation of psychology, specifically within the operating conditioning postulated by Skinner.
According to this approach, the behaviors we issue are handled by the consequences that follow them. In this way, a behavior will be repeated if after it comes a reinforcement and, on the other hand, you will see its frequency reduced if after it comes a punishment. The positive punishment is the one we most associated with the term punish. This consists of giving or presenting something unpleasant after a behavior that we want to eliminate either to give a reprimand, cheeks or any other aversive stimulus.
On the other hand, negative punishment consists of withdrawing something pleasant after unwanted behavior can be why do we use the punishment? This educational method has been used for a long time and there are numerous people who defend their virtues as a way to relate to our children. What does an attractive education method do of the punishment? It is short -term effective. The punishment is effective when reducing the frequency of appearance of certain inappropriate behaviors, at least at the moment.
Is what we have lived. Many of the parents who currently use punishment with their children have learned and experienced it in their meats with their own parents. It is the mode of interaction that they have seen all their lives and have it internalized. It does not require much investment of time or explanation because it is enough to give or withdraw what we have chosen as punishment.
The punishment is based on blind obedience. With the punishment the child does or stops doing something so that mom does not yell at me or so that Dad does not prevent me from watching television. However, this does not produce positive learning, no value is internalized nor is it understood why one must be responsible for their actions.
Humiliation in the child, which can bring dire consequences: it leads to the loss of confidence of the child in the parents, since he does not feel treated with respect. It can generate anger, need for revenge or distance from parents. It damages its self – esteem, inhibits its spontaneity and in many cases, it generates a dependence on the person in command in which the child loses initiative and avoids making decisions so that they are not incorrect. Can cause tension, aggressiveness or lie.
As a result of the fact that deep learning has not produced the child, it will not modify her behavior by their own conviction and will only be discovered. Positive discipline: the alternative to punishment then, if punishment is not the solution, how do we educate, guide and teach values to our children? Based on the studies of Adler and Dreikurs and the valuable book by Jane Nelsen, this approach highlights the importance of maintaining the respect and dignity of the little ones when educating them. Own values, which are able to regulate their emotions and reflect on the natural consequences of their actions.