THE TRANITION IN FRIENDSHIP
Introduction
According to Marcia of betrayal in friendship, no one can without love to live. Some will agree with it and others do not, however Aristotle decreed that man is a social being by nature, so that all of them all seek to relate in some way or another, feel loved by those around them and know that they can rely on someone; Consequently everyone looks for a true friendship. Friendship is a relationship that is established as time passes, based on values that will reinforce it such as trust, honesty, loyalty, etc. So it is possible to understand friendship as a link that links people and directs them to share experiences, opinions, ideologies, among others.
Developing
Establishing a real and enriching friendship is a difficult task, perhaps one so difficult that not everyone has managed to get it. This is due to the different factors that influence the stability of friendly relationships; You are probably not looking for friends in the right place, or surely the place is not the problem, but you load with so many insecurities that it is impossible for you to see beyond them and create links. Fr. Jerome Cummings says that a friend is someone who knows us, but he loves us anyway, so your insecurities should not be a problem, so, knowing what is the factor that affects the way you relate to others is almost so Difficult how to establish a true friendship. Maybe you think you surround yourself with people who consider your friends, you may consider your best friends, but how do you know that your friends are true?
The most influential factor in a friendship and in all kinds of relationship is communication, since if her effectiveness is not good, it will not be the relationship. Davison Munodawafa in 2008 defined in communication as verbal transmission and nonverbal messages. It consists of a sender, a receiver and a communication channel, so it is understood that communication is the fact of issuing something, be it an idea, a thought, a feeling, etc. Therefore, communication is elementary when interacting with other people because some type of message is always being transmitted; from facial gestures and posture to what is said verbally. The way in which the Palo Alto School defines communication reinforces the aforementioned, since it determines that communication is a permanent social process that integrates multiple modes of behavior, such as the word, gesture, look and interindividual space.
Communication has a very important role in friendships because they basically depend on it. It would be practically impossible to maintain a friendly relationship in which it is difficult to have a fixed conversation or one where the other person’s body expressions are annoying according to your criteria; Since there would simply exist that click or connection that is usually present when interacting with people of your liking, which is necessary to maintain a pleasant coexistence for both people participating in the friendly relationship.
Not all friends are the same, do not tell your secrets to all your friends, as well as no party with all; so it is necessary to classify them. Aristotle catalogs friendships in three: friendship for pleasure, friendship for utility and perfect friendship. According to Aristotle in friendship for pleasure, complaints take place, since both get what they want, complacing each. This type of friendship flourishes when both people have common factors that unites them, whether they practice the same sport, have the same musical tastes, among others and in this way they are joined by their tastes.
The second type of friendship is by utility, which lasts the time that mutual benefits are provided. Friendship by utility usually occurs mainly between opposites; For example, between poor and rich, between the ignorant and the sage, because one aspires to what he casually needs and offers something else in return.
This was defined by Aristotle and refers to the fact that friendship depends on a mutual benefit they receive from the other party and comes to an end when said benefit ends. The third and last type of friendship is the perfect friendship. This is defined by Aristotle as the friendship of the best, of the good ones; It is a reciprocal friendship and mutual choice, because as it has been said, the loved one is kind to the one who loves, and the same one who loves is kind to the one who is loved; This friendship only occurs in humans, because only they perceive the choice.
These are friendships that commonly last a lifetime, thanks to the fact that not only tastes are shared, but also values and virtues, which makes friendship much more valuable.
conclusion
To know if your friendships are that perfect friendship that Aristotle describes you must identify whether they have a symmetrical relationship or not, this refers to the fact that both people in the relationship are complemented in an equivalent way, when there is equality between them and are willing to put on your part for friendship to last; that is to say that the friendly relationship is balanced. If your relationship is not symmetrical and one of the two people is striving more than the other, then it is not a true friendship, since one is giving the extra that the other does not, making the relationship an unfair friendship. According to Ralph Waldo Emerson, ‘the only way to have a friend is to be one and in this way everything is given and everything is received in the relationship.
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