Keys and benefits of positive parenting
Being parents is a challenge. Every day it can be exasperating – especially with young children – and it is very difficult not to lose the papers when we are at the limit of patience. However, educating your children can become an easier and more pleasant task, both for you and for them, thanks to positive upbringing.
What is positive parenting?
Positive parenting or positive parenting is a philosophy based on the investigations of Viennese psychiatrists Alfred Adler and Rudolf Freikyrs. They focus on the future instead of the past. That is, the importance of learning -for the future -instead of punishing -peeled-.This philosophy that combines education and discipline emphasizes mutual respect between parents and children. Therefore, positive parenting not only requires the effort of both parties, parents and children, but also requires cooperation.The doctor in Education Psychology Jane Nelsen is an expert in positive upbringing.
Following the investigations of Adler and Dreikurs, she has written a series of paternity books and has designed a program for parents based on positive parenting that teaches social skills, through respect and discipline.For Nelsen, being a father or mother with a positive discipline means being kind and firm at the same time. This is effective in the long term as it helps children to feel a connection with their parents. Here lies the main characteristic of positive parenting: the connection consolidates a sense of belonging to the family.
KEYS: Mutual respect
Children deserve the same consideration as others. If we maintain an attitude of respect for our children, we are at the same time teaching them a behavior model to continue with our example.Teaching social skills for good character. That is, teach from empathy, concern for others, and responsibility.Effective communication and problem solving skills.Discipline based on teaching. This does not mean that it is a permissive parenting but that discipline should not be punitive.Focus on looking for solutions instead of punishing. It is more effective to reflect the child than focus on punishing him. The punishment can deteriorate the family relationship and there is a risk that the child’s behavior may worsen. If you react to their behavior empathically, you will help your child to concentrate on improving her behavior instead of getting angry with you.
Benefits of positive parenting
Positive parenting helps build healthy relationships between parents and children, which would be the backbone of this approach. What is achieved with the consolidation of the parents-child bond is that children want to cooperate for themselves.To create a healthy bond, it is important that we congratulate our children when they act in an exemplary way. Because what would happen if they see that they only call our attention when they behave badly? The conclusion is clear: they see punishment as a reward.
According to Dr. Nina Farzin, positive parenting does not have to be a lack of discipline. That is, in this educational approach the bad behavior must be detected and corrected; But it is done from a way that repetition of positive behavior is encouraged, not avoiding punishment.High self-esteem. The benefits of positive parenting are not only for children but also for parents. Children, seeing that their parents are empathic with their behavior, will feel more confident. Parents, on the other hand, seeing how their abilities help their children, and in turn prepare them for a successful future, their self – esteem will be reinforced.
Stronger relationships
Positive parenting facilitates the creation of strong ties between parents and children, which encourages healthy relationships between the two. That is, children who feel a close bond with their parents naturally want to please them and, therefore, strive to follow their advice and imitate their behavior."Many people think that discipline is the essence of breeding the children. But that’s not fatherhood. Being a father is not telling his son what to do when he behaves badly (…) is to provide the conditions to perform her human potential ’. -Gordon Neufeld
In short, the benefits of positive parenting can be observed in children both emotionally and behavioral. In addition, parents are also benefited: they can educate with discipline without damaging family ties. Those children who maintain strong ties with their parents feel more confident when making decisions and relating in their social life. This translates into greater social competence and better mental health. While, meanwhile, parents will feel more confident when educating our children, through empathy and respect.
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